


Bossy

by katestagram (katelusive)



Series: we can't escape this; it's in our bones [1]
Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Anal Sex, Blowjobs, Codependency Issues, M/M, Messed up power dynamics, Smut, canon-typical horribleness, dirty talking, like truly filthy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-01-19
Packaged: 2018-05-14 22:23:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5761123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katelusive/pseuds/katestagram
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mac gets a little too bossy sometimes.  It's Dennis's job to take him down a notch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bossy

**Author's Note:**

> This is easily the filthiest piece of writing I've ever released into the wild. I'm sorry for my trash ways and horrible brain. That said, it does have a part 2 if anyone's interested.

“I’m just saying, dude, if we moved it over there, it would look a million times better. And plus, then we’d have room for the TV –“

“For the last time, Mac,” Dennis interjects, “we’re not getting a goddamn flatscreen TV in here.”

“But it would be awesome!”

“I know it would be awesome, but that’s not the point. We can’t afford it, and we don’t need it. What we really need to talk about is why you were in the shower for three hours. I mean do you have any idea how expensive –”

“That’s not important,” interrupts Mac. “What’s important is the table. Listen Dennis, it’s gonna be great. It’s gonna make the whole room flow –“

“We’re not moving it. Nothing is flowing anywhere.” 

“But it would look a million times better!”

“I know,” says Dennis, scrubbing a hand over his face. “You’ve said that now – four? Five times, maybe?”

“So what?” Mac crosses his arms defensively across his chest. He looks ridiculous in his ripped up Penn State t-shirt – he didn’t even go to Penn State, first of all – with his cheeks flushed, hair unslicked and wild and still damp from his stupidly long shower. It’s a good thing he looks cute while he has his mini-tantrums, or Dennis probably would’ve killed him a long time ago.

“So,” says Dennis patiently, like he’s talking to the world’s most muscular six-year-old, “shut up about it. I already know your opinion.” 

“Okay. We can talk about it later.”

“No!” Dennis explodes, a little more forcefully than he means to. He evens out his tone with some amount of effort. “We don’t have to talk about it later, Mac, because there’s nothing to talk about. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get ready for my date. Not that there’s any hot water left in the state of Pennsylvania for me.” 

“Wait, what? You have another date tonight?” Mac whines, following Dennis into his room and flopping dramatically down onto his bed. “Dude, I thought we were gonna get buffalo wings and watch Armageddon.” 

“Yes, I have a date, and we just watched that two nights ago,” says Dennis, giving himself a preliminary once-over in the mirror. Not bad. His hair could use a little work, and he’s definitely gonna have to change his shirt, but he looks pretty fly. He quirks a sexy smile at himself. 

“I guess we can just watch it when you come back.”

“Definitely not,” says Dennis, unbuttoning his shirt. “I’ll be bringing home some pretty hot tail tonight, so actually I’m gonna need you to clear out. Go move Charlie’s furniture around.”

“Charlie doesn’t have any furniture. And, hang on, you don’t want me here at all?”

“Not particularly,” says Dennis. “Nothing personal, bro, you’ve just been a little –  
underfoot lately.” 

He’s being very generous, actually. Mac has ruined four dates in the last two weeks with everything from whining to gratuitous noise to, at one point, a small grease fire. He’s damn lucky to be alive. The first-degree burns were nothing compared to what Dennis wanted to do to him.

Dennis catches Mac’s eyes in the mirror. He’s pouting and trying to look tough at the same time. It’s a tough look to pull off. Mac doesn’t have what it takes. Dennis rolls his eyes. 

“Get out of my room, dude. I need to get dressed.”

“Okay, but you’ll text me later, right? When you’re at the restaurant, and in the cab, and whatever? You know, just three or four texts, just to check in?” 

He meets Dennis’s eyes, dark and plaintive. He’s so needy sometimes. Dennis turns around to face him, annoyed. 

“No, I’m not gonna text you tonight.”

“What? Why not? You gotta check in with me, man. What if you get into a jam?” 

“That’s not gonna happen. I’m going out for a relaxing night on the town with a beautiful woman. I don’t want to be glued to my phone the whole time texting you. That defeats the whole purpose of going out in the first place.”

“It does not!” Mac says forcefully, crossing his arms. He’s barefoot, Dennis notices randomly, which is weird. It makes him seem younger, somehow. Vulnerable. 

“We have a system. You have to text me!”

Dennis takes a deep breath, scrubbing both hands through his hair and over his face. He graciously suppresses the urge to lunge at Mac’s throat and choke him, just a little, until he shuts up. He counts to three, and when he speaks, his voice is calm and even.

“Okay, first of all, I don’t have to do anything.”

Mac opens his mouth to protest, and Dennis silences him with a finger.

“Secondly, Mac, you need to chill the fuck out. You’re being bossy as shit today and it’s starting to piss me off.”

“Oh, it’s pissing you off?” says Mac, sitting up straighter on the bed. His cheeks are getting pink, which gives Dennis a strange satisfaction. If he wants a fight, he’ll get it.

“Yeah, it is,” says Dennis. “And you know what else? I like that table exactly where it is, so that’s where it’s gonna goddamn stay. You don’t run things around here, Mac, so you’d better back the fuck off.” 

Mac leaps off the bed, hands balled into fists. For a second, Dennis thinks he’s gonna get attacked, but then Mac stalks past him out of the room, slamming Dennis’s door behind him. 

“Thank god,” Dennis mutters to himself, turning back to his own reflection. That’s when he hears the unmistakable sound of furniture being dragged across the wood floor. 

“Oh goddammit, Mac!” he shouts, throwing the door open and catching Mac in the act. 

Mac drops the two legs of the table he’d been dragging on the floor, red-faced. “It would look a million times better over here and you know it! I’m doing both of us a favor!”

“Step away from the table, Mac,” says Dennis in his most I-mean-business voice. Mac, the petulant little shit, moves like he’s gonna pick it back up. 

“Mac, you fuckin’ freeze right now! I mean it!” 

“Oh yeah? Is that an order?” asks Mac. He thrusts his chin into the air like a challenge. His hands are balled into fists. Dennis has no idea what he’s so angry about. He doesn’t have time to deal with Mac’s unresolved rage issues. 

“Yeah, it is,” says Dennis. “That’s my table and from now on, you’re banned from touching it.” 

“I’ll touch whatever I want to. This is my apartment too.”

“Hands off the fucking table, asshole,” says Dennis. Now he’s getting angry too. Fucking Mac and his dumbass authority issues.

“Why don’t you come over here and make me, if you’re such a boss?”

“Maybe I will,” says Dennis, forcing his jaw to unclench. 

“Big man,” taunts Mac, “got a fuckin’ date, thinks he’s too good for best friend check-ins –“

“You’re obsessed with that table, and you’re obsessed with me!” 

“You have no eye for interior decorating, Dennis Reynolds, and I’ve stood by and watched you wreck the feng shui of this apartment for long enough –“

“Feng shui? Oh my god, dude, you’re the most delusional person I’ve ever met. What do you know about feng shui?”

“More than you,” says Mac, breathing hard. Dennis is standing close enough to him to smell his cologne. He’s only wearing one today, thank god, but it’s strong enough for three or four people. “I read a pamphlet.”

“Oh, you read a pamphlet,” mocks Dennis. “Jesus Christ. We’re all saved from bad decorating. Mac read a pamphlet.” He steps closer, and Mac doesn’t back down. They’re practically nose to nose now, sharing breath, glaring at each other.

“Fuck off, Dennis. It’s about time one of us took the initiative to fix up this shithole.” 

“For such a know-it-all, you've never figured out when to back off,” remarks Dennis. “It’s a shame.” 

“Why should I?” Mac says condescendingly. “You’re not gonna deck me. You don’t have the guts, dude. You’re all show.”

“Am I?” Dennis fists a hand in the front of his t-shirt.

He’s not usually one for shows of needless aggression – that’s more Mac’s style – but this is getting out of hand. Luckily, Dennis knows exactly how to handle it. He can feel Mac’s pulse thrumming like a live wire, nervous energy jangling just below the surface. He wonders if Mac has an erection.

“Don’t touch me,” snaps Mac. That means yes.

“Get on your fucking knees, then,” Dennis whispers. Mac doesn’t move, so Dennis pushes him down by the shoulders, meeting almost no resistance. He unbuckles his belt and goddamn if Mac’s mouth isn’t practically watering. 

Usually there’s more of a struggle than this. On a normal day, Mac would be making excuses, pretending like his obvious arousal was just some kind of weird coincidence, but today – much to Dennis’s surprise and arousal – he opens his mouth obediently and takes Dennis’s hard cock down his throat without a word. 

Dennis tangles a hand in his hair, moving his head up and down. Mac’s eyes are half downturned, long dark lashes and unreadable softness. Usually Mac is an open book that Dennis knows by heart. It’s unsettling and sexy to not know what Mac is thinking. But he can still guess.

“This is what you wanted all along, wasn’t it,” he grunts, holding Mac’s head in place as he shallowly fucks his mouth. Mac makes an unintelligible noise around his cock, and Dennis smirks. “Oh, what was that? Sorry, couldn’t hear you over that mouthful of my dick.”

Mac makes an indignant-sounding noise. Dennis pushes his head down until he gags. “Not so bossy now, huh?”

He pulls out for a second, like he’s gonna give Mac a chance to speak, then rams his cock back in. Mac chokes a little, eyes wide and upturned, and Dennis can see him rubbing himself through his jeans even as his eyes water. 

Although neither of them has ever said it aloud, Dennis knows for a fact that Mac loves being manhandled. And few things get him harder than a thick cock jammed all the way down his throat.

“Fuck yeah, you love this, don’t you,” he murmurs, both hands in Mac’s hair now, holding his head in place, “you bossy little bitch. I should do this more often. Shut you up. Put you in your place.” 

Mac jerks his head away and tries to say something but Dennis is too strong for him, fucking his mouth slow and hard. “Shh, shh.” 

Mac’s mouth feels good, hot and tight, and Dennis likes the clumsy, desperate way he’s trying to jerk himself off at the same time. 

When he finally pulls out, Mac is gasping for air, spit and precum smeared on his chin. He’s staring up at Dennis with new eyes, dark with lust. He stands up, wobbles, grabs Dennis’s elbows for support. He smells like cologne and sweet shampoo.

“You fuckin’ dickhead,” he whispers. Dennis stares him down, daring him to make the next move.

And he does – his mouth crashes against Dennis’s, more violence than kiss. Dennis pulls Mac over to the couch. They can’t fuck in either of their rooms – Dennis doesn’t want his already smelling like sex when he brings Vanessa home later, and it’s always weird to fuck Mac in his bed with all of the Jesuses watching. Although they’re usually drunk off their asses to begin with, which tends to make it less weird in general. All of this is uncharted territory.

Mac drags him down, pulling their mouths together again. Another surprise. Dennis gives in for the time being, although he’s not a fan of this much kissing. He keeps waiting for Mac to pull back and breathlessly declare his heterosexuality but the moment never comes. Instead, Mac’s tugging at his own belt buckle, and Dennis helps him. 

“I see how it is. You wanna get fucked, don’t you,” says Dennis in a low voice. 

Mac doesn’t say anything, but Dennis can feel the thrill of excitement that runs through him. He wonders if Mac has ever been this continually silent at any other point in his life. It seems impossible. The silence is going straight to Dennis’s dick. 

“Is that what you were doing for so long in the shower? Opening yourself up for me?”

Mac makes an unintelligible noise, and Dennis flips him over, pulling down his jeans. “Guess I’ll just find out for myself. Hands and knees, bitch.” 

Mac, for all of his many faults, is always spectacularly clean. Dennis definitely gives him kudos for that. He’s fucked plenty of girls with much dirtier assholes than Mac, and that’s a pretty high compliment coming from Dennis. Dennis slides off the couch and onto his knees. 

“You’re gonna like this,” he says. Mac’s legs are trembling, and he gives a helpless little moan when Dennis pulls his ass apart and licks a broad stripe between his cheeks. 

“Mm,” says Dennis, and does it again. He tastes like soap. “Oh yeah,” Dennis mumbles against Mac’s ass. “You fuckin’ love this. God, you’re such a slut, aren’t you.” 

Shockingly, Mac responds only with a groan, pushing his ass back against Dennis’s face. Without warning him, Dennis slides in a finger. Nice and tight. He hears Mac choke back a gasp. 

“If I knew this was the way to shut you up, I would’ve started fucking you years ago,” he remarks. 

“Fuck off, dude,” says Mac, voice choked. “That’s not what this is about.” 

“Oh no? What’s it about then?” He adds another finger, pushing them in and out, lube-free. It’s gotta hurt at least a little, but Mac’s clearly holding back moans, jerking himself frantically. 

“Slow down there, cowboy,” says Dennis with a low chuckle. “It’s not a race.” 

“Shut the fuck up, Dennis,” says Mac, gritting his teeth. “Just do this if you’re gonna do it.” 

“Oh yeah? You want me to fuck you?” Dennis pulls out his fingers and reaches for the lube he knows is in the back pocket of his jeans. He was saving it for Vanessa, but whatever. He has plenty more. 

“Don’t make me beg for it, douchebag.”

“You know what, Mac? You’re not really in a position to boss me around right now,” says Dennis, lubing up his cock. With one slick motion, he slides halfway into Mac’s ass. 

He’s more or less completely unprepared, and the tightness darkens Dennis’s vision for an instant. He laughs breathlessly, one hand on Mac’s hip. 

Mac says, “What the fuck, dude,” gripping the arm of the couch so tightly that Dennis can see the blood rushing out of his fingers. But he doesn’t complain. He actually pushes back into it, which Dennis finds impossibly sexy. 

“Yeah,” breathes Dennis, rocking into him slowly, “oh yeah, that’s it. You like that, don’t you. You just wanna get your ass pounded by a big thick cock.” 

Mac doesn’t deny it. He feels amazing around Dennis’s cock, all clenching muscles and white heat. He’s not ready to get fucked, which makes Dennis want to go even harder. He knows Mac can take it. Mac probably wants to take it. Dennis fucked him dry one time when they were drunk on whiskey and he begged for more with tears in his eyelashes. 

“Tell me you like it,” orders Dennis. Mac doesn’t say anything, just pushes back against Dennis’s cock, driving him further inside. Dennis grabs his hip, grinding into him. “Tell me,” he says again. “Tell me or I’m gonna stop.”

“Keep going,” whispers Mac. “I like it.” 

“Hell yeah you do.” Dennis fucks all the way into him, and Mac makes a strangled little noise. He’s usually a lot more vocal than this – swearing a blue streak and apologizing to God for his homo sins, begging for more at the same time as he condemns himself to hell. 

But today Mac doesn’t say any of those things. Today Mac just presses his face into the couch cushions and lets Dennis plow his ass. It’s a little disconcerting. 

“Good boy,” breathes Dennis. “God, look at you, taking my dick like that.”

Mac twists around to look at him. He’s so easy. He just wants to be praised. 

“Good boy,” Dennis says again, and Mac moans, quietly, like he’s trying to stop himself. 

Fucking Mac is always an interesting experience. Dennis isn’t in love with him, but he’s no throwaway girl, either. If Dennis uses sex to fill a hole inside himself, fucking Mac does it more effectively than anyone else. Not that he would ever admit it. 

But there’s something intoxicating about having his best friend on his knees, silently begging for it. Mac has come a long way in the last year. He’s gone from a homophobic piece of shit who wouldn’t dream of sucking cock to a homophobic piece of shit who gives it up for Dennis on the regular. It’s a huge improvement in his character if you ask Dennis.

“Ah, shit,” moans Mac, jerking himself furiously. “Oh my god, dude, that’s so good.”

“Don’t you dare come yet,” hisses Dennis, digging his nails into Mac’s ass. “Hands off your cock.” 

He pulls out and pushes Mac roughly over on the couch so they’re face to face. 

They’ve never fucked like this before. Mac’s eyes are wide and dark, a question on his lips that doesn’t have a chance to come out before Dennis enters him again, and his lips screw together in pain and pleasure. His cock is rock-hard and leaking against his stomach. The sight turns Dennis on more than he would ever admit. 

Mac reaches for it again and Dennis slaps his hand away. “Not until I say you can.” 

“Dennis, fuck man,” says Mac, breathing hard, cheeks flushed, “goddammit, don’t tell me what to do.” 

“Well I think,” says Dennis delicately, wrapping long fingers around Mac’s rigid cock, “that while I’m inside you, you’re my bitch and I get to do whatever I want to you.” 

Mac’s cheeks get noticeably redder, and Dennis thinks this is definitely it – the moment he’s going to profess his straightness, right in the middle of having extremely gay sex with his best friend. It certainly wouldn’t be the first time. 

Usually it annoys Dennis, makes him clap his hand over Mac’s mouth as he fucks him, but today he finds himself almost missing it. It’s part of the thrill – Mac promising God and Dennis and himself that he’s not gay, even as he blows his load with a cock up his ass. 

“Oh fuck dude, harder, I just wanna come –“

“Say it, then,” says Dennis, hand still on Mac’s dick. Mac tries unsuccessfully to thrust up against his palm. 

“Say – what?” 

“Tell me you’re my little bitch, and I’ll let you come.” 

A vein throbs in Mac’s neck and Dennis can feel his pulse thrumming hard and fast. He slows his thrusts, expertly regulating his own ascent towards climax. He has some goddamn self-control, unlike some people. 

“Oh for fuck’s sake – come on dude, I’m so close –“ 

“Tell me,” says Dennis, carefully and deliberately, “that you’re my sweet, dumb little bitch. My slutty boy toy. And you’d do anything to get my cock up your ass.” 

“What the fuck, bro,” sputters Mac, but Dennis can feel him tightening around his cock. Incredibly, this entire exchange is turning him on. Or maybe it’s Dennis’s hand still wrapped around his cock, stroking almost imperceptibly in time with his shallow thrusts. 

“Say it,” says Dennis again, soft and implacable. He’s thinking of the one and only time he allowed Mac to fuck him, after a Halloween party when they were both still half in-costume and drunk off their asses. Mac had slammed him against a wall and insisted that Dennis call him a badass. And when Dennis finally said it, Mac immediately came harder than Dennis could ever possibly have been prepared for. He’d felt that one for weeks. Six months later and it’s finally payback.

“I’m your bitch,” says Mac quietly, without meeting Dennis’s eyes. Dennis takes his chin in hand and tilts his face up like he might lean down and kiss him. 

“What was that?” he asks sweetly. “What did you say to me, Mac?”

“I’m your little bitch, okay, I fucking said it,” says Mac defensively, wrenching his face out of Dennis’s grip. Dennis strokes his cock, and Mac’s mouth falls slack. Dennis bites his lower lip, grinning. Mac is so easy. 

“Oh yeah you are, baby boy. Tell me again and I’ll make this nice for you.” 

“I’m your – fuck – I’m – Dennis, oh my god, dude –“ 

Dennis knows from experience exactly how Mac likes to be fucked, and the look on his face says that Dennis is doing a damn good job. In fact, Mac looks like he’s about five seconds away from blowing his load, so Dennis slows down again. 

“Come on, one more time,” he says, panting. Mac’s staring at him like he’s never seen him before. Dennis’s own orgasm is building, waiting for its cue, ready to become overwhelming. But not yet. He wants to make Mac work for it. “One more time, and you can come all over yourself like the slut you are.” 

“Den, please –“

“Say it, Mac.” Dennis wraps his other hand loosely around the base of Mac’s throat, the way he knows Mac likes it. It’s gonna make him crazy. Goddammit, Dennis wants to come. He presses harder on Mac’s throat. 

“Say it, asshole!”

“Fucking hell Dennis,” Mac gasps out, “I’m your dumb little boy toy, okay, I’m all yours, is that what you want me to –“

“You’re my fuckin’ bitch, Mac, now come for me,” says Dennis, thrusting deep inside him and squeezing his throat at the same time. 

Mac’s eyes screw shut as he comes, right on command, just like Dennis knew he would. Cheeks flushed red, veins standing out in his neck, mouth open and silent like he’s in pain. 

Dennis has never particularly enjoyed the feeling of hot jizz against his skin but for some reason, this time, it spurs him on, fucking Mac harder and more erratically as he climbs the mountain of his own climax. 

“Oh yeah, that’s it, baby,” he croons, riding Mac through his orgasm, nails digging into his skin hard enough to leave bloody crescents along his neck and shoulders. 

He comes like a landslide, all thoughts breaking away like rocks tumbling from the edge of a cliff into the ocean far below. And for a split second, there’s nothing. Just that full, blissful solitude, like everything is right and Dennis is exactly where he should be. 

Then he’s jangling back to reality, nerves singing, sweat dripping into his eyes and Mac’s sticky hand against his cheek. He jerks his face away. 

“Gross, dude. Get that away from me!” 

“Sorry,” says Mac, wide-eyed. 

Dennis pulls out and unintentionally makes a mess on the couch. Guess he and Vanessa won’t be stopping in the living room tonight. Dennis clambers off of Mac without a word, in search of something to clean up the mess. He finds a slightly damp towel hanging on the back of a chair and throws it on Mac. 

“I think you might need another shower, bro.” 

“Nah, I’m alright,” says Mac, voice faint and shell-shocked. He’s sitting up now, just holding the towel, hair sticking up in several crazy directions. He has jizz on his left cheekbone. Dennis isn’t sure how it got there, but it’s a little bit cute. 

“Well, I need one, anyway,” says Dennis. “Where are all the other towels?”

“Uh, I kinda – used them.”

“All of them?”

“There were only two,” Mac snaps. “And I needed one for my hair, so it didn’t drip all over the place –“

“Oh my god, bro. You’re such a woman. Give that back.”

He reaches for the towel, and Mac jerks it out of his reach. “No way, man, this is my clean-up towel. Find your own.” 

He’s not even using it to actually clean up, which is the frustrating thing. Dennis pulls on his jeans. Mac’s watching him out of the corner of his eye, in that way that means he thinks he’s being subtle. 

“What?” Dennis asks, exasperated. “Do you have something to say?” 

“No,” says Mac, and Dennis rolls his eyes. “Okay, fine, I was just gonna ask – so you’re still, um, you’re definitely still going out?” 

“Yeah,” says Dennis, nonplussed, “obviously. Why?”

There’s a long pause, as Mac refuses to meet his eyes, and then it dawns on Dennis. 

“Oh Jesus Christ, man. Come on.”

“What?” Mac asks defensively. He has the towel on his lap now, still pantsless, probably getting more cum all over the couch. 

“Did you really think I was gonna cancel a date with one of the hottest women I’ve ever met just because I fucked you beforehand?”

“No,” says Mac, avoiding his eyes, “I just thought – you know, you did tell me we could watch that movie. You did.” 

“Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t remember that. What’s the big deal about tonight, anyway? Why can’t we just do it tomorrow?”

“We can,” says Mac, not meeting Dennis’s eyes. “It’s fine.” 

“Good,” says Dennis. “And don’t touch that fucking table while I’m gone.” 

He walks briskly past Mac towards the bathroom, feeling Mac’s puppy dog eyes on him the entire time. 

Whatever. It’s only one night.


End file.
